DECEMBER 21, 2010
December 21 is … Look At The Bright Side Day, National Flashlight Day, National French Fried Shrimp Day, and Hamburger Day End of the year, had to get them in.
The Bears looked good against an inferior opponent. Good luck in the playoffs.
Do you think the ego of Brett Favre talked him into starting Monday night, on national TV, just so he could pick the right time to exit the NFL, as a wounded warrior? I do. I hope Favre gets it. You cannot compete any longer at the NFL level. Even a blind squirrel finds a nut now and again, like Favre has been doing for several years.
I have a running argument with many friends and family members. I know the argument could be settled through Google but I have looked it up and found inconsistent answers:
WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE HORSE IN JINGLE BELLS? THE ONE PULLING THE ONE-HORSE OPEN SLEIGH.
I am going to tell a story I bring out every Christmas. I will clean it up for general audiences.
An elderly lady was recently widowed just before Christmas. She was lonely and thought about different ways to secure some company for the Christmas. She decided she wanted a pet. She and her late husband never had a pet so she decided this would be a new, fun experience for her.
She went to a local pet shop she had driven by for the last thirty years. She told the clerk she was looking for a pet to provide her company in her new chapter in life. She looked around a bit. The clerk suggested fish but she didn’t like that idea. She then noticed a parrot sitting on its perch in an out-of-the-way corner. She told the clerk she wanted the parrot. The clerk told her she wouldn’t like that parrot. He said the parrot was mean and swore a lot. The lady was undeterred. She could make him a nicer parrot and she had heard swearing before.
She bought the parrot, a cage, a perch, food toys and a cover. She then took the parrot home and set him up in a prominent place in the living room where she spent most of her time while at home. Everything was going fine. She talked to the parrot, trying to get him to talk back to her. The parrot was not acting mean or aggressive.
After about two hours, the parrot was getting used to his new home. He squawked at the lady and swore at her for five minutes. He called her all kinds of vile names, ultimately calling her a b*tch. The lady did not like that and told him he was a bad parrot. She told him she would stop the swearing. She put him in the freezer.
After about five minutes, she took him out of the freezer and put him back on his perch. The parrot looked perplexed and cold. After a few minutes, he was thawed out enough to speak. He started swearing at his owner again. This time he used words and called her names she had never heard. “OK Mr. Parrot. That’s enough of that. I’ll show you who’s boss” she said as she grabbed the parrot and put him back into the freezer. She really was going to teach him a lesson this time. She left him in the freezer for thirty minutes before taking him out.
She placed the parrot on his perch. He was nearly frozen. It took twenty minutes for him to open his eyes. He started to perk up a bit, stretching his wings, breaking the frost from his feathers. He slowly looked around not quite sure what to do. He then noticed the lady sitting in her chair. He spoke up, “Lady, what the f*ck did that turkey say?” he asked.
The horse in Jingle Bells has a name. The name is Bob. Think about it, “Bells on Bob’s tail ring.”
“There`s so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.”
Notable events on this date:
- 1582 - Flanders adopts Gregorian calendar, tomorrow is Jan 1 1583
- 1620 - 103 Mayflower pilgrims land at Plymouth Rock [OS=Dec 11
- 1864 - Gen Sherman conquers Savannah
- 1913 - 1st crossword puzzle (with 32 clues) printed in NY World
- 1929 - 1st group hospital insurance plan offered (Dallas Tx)
- 1946 - Frank Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life," premieres
- 1951 - Joe DiMaggio announces his retirement
- 1954 - Dr Sam Sheppard's wife Marilyn is murdered in her home in Cleveland, (he is accused of crime). The Fugitive is based on the Sam Sheppard case.
- 1968 - David Crosby, Stephen Stills & Graham Nash premiere together in Calif. Teach your children well.
- 1978 - Police in Des Plaines Ill, arrest John Wayne Gacy, Jr. for murder
- 1988 - NY bound Pan Am jumbo jet explodes over Scotland all 258 aboard die. This is still in the news with the gut responsible supposed to die in two months, sixteen months ago.
- 1989 - VP Quayle sends out 30,000 Xmas cards with word beacon spelled beacon
- 1991 - US actress Jane Fonda marries CNN-director Ted Turner
- 2010 – Chicago Bears win NFC North Title( actually on the 20th).
Notable births on this date:
- 1117 - Thomas Becket, archbishop of Canterbury
- 1879 - Joseph Stalin, [Dzoegashvili], Russian dictator; murdered 11,000,000
- 1908 - Pat Weaver, LA Calif, TV Executive (started Today show)
- 1909 - George Ball, Iowa, lawyer/undersecretary of state
- 1924 - Joe Paterno, football coach (Penn State, SI Sportsman of 1986)
- 1926 - Pedro Gonzales-Gonzalez, Aguilares Tx, actor (Rio Bravo)
- 1937 - Jane Fonda, NYC, actress (Barbarella, Klute), physically fit
- 1954 - Chris Evert Lloyd Mills, Ft Lauderdale, tennis pro 'Miss pokerface'
Notable deaths on this date:
- 1928 - Harry Butt, cricketer (England wicket-keeper v S Africa 1895-96), dies
- 1940 - F Scott Fitzgerald, author (Zelda), dies of a heart attack at 44
- 1945 - George S Patton, US General (Sicily/Normandy), dies in car crash at 60
- 1989 - Elena Ceaucescu, wife of Romanian dictator Nicolae, executed
- 1989 - Nicolae Ceaucescu, Romanian dictator (1945-89), executed
Today is a great day to buy my book. It makes a great gift for anyone including, yourself. Buy it while you still have money. There are just six shopping days before Christmas; buy now and beat the rush.
BRUCE A. BRENNAN
DEKALB, IL 60115
COPYRIGHT 2010
Email: brucebrennanlaw@aol.com
www.brucebrennanlaws.com
www.lawyerbruceabrennan.com
Go to web sites below to buy books by Bruce A. Brennan
www.barnesandnoble.com (do a quick search, Title, my name)
www.smashwords.com Do a Title or author search, Check this site out.
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